By Rachel Hariri
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October 31, 2023
One of the nursery songs I would listen to as a young girl was “There’s a Hole in my Bucket” and in case you’re unfamiliar with this song or are dredging it up from the recesses of your mind, here are some of the lyrics: There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza, There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, There's a hole. Then fix it dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, Then fix it dear Henry, dear Henry, fix it. With what should I fix it, dear Liza, dear Liza, With what should I fix it, dear Liza, with what? With a straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, With a straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, with a straw. But the straw is too long, dear Liza, dear Liza, The straw is too long, dear Liza, too long. Then cut it dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, Then cut it dear Henry, dear Henry, cut it! With what shall I cut it, dear Liza, dear Liza, With what shall I cut it, dear Liza, with what? With an ax, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, With an ax, dear Henry, an ax. But the ax is too dull, dear Liza, dear Liza, The ax is too dull, dear Liza, too dull. The song continues on with Henry then needing a whetstone to sharpen the ax, but his stone is dry so needs water to wet the stone but can’t get the water because he has a hole in his bucket. I always thought this was a very silly song and always wondered why Henry didn’t go and get a new bucket, or use a bowl, or at least use duct tape! Now, after completing my first 9 months in vocational ministry, I’ve realized there’s a hole in my bucket and I’m wondering, Do you have a hole in your bucket? Recently, pastor Rich Villodas, from Queens, New York visited my church and led a leadership training. There were many great pieces of wisdom gleaned from the hour, but what I’ve been chewing on for the last week is this: “Our doing for Jesus must be sustained by being with Jesus and the greatest gift we give to others is our ongoing transformation in Christ.” This statement was followed up by the encouragement to be “mindful of using God-activity to run from yourself or intimacy with God.” Alas, therein lies the hole in my bucket. Somehow in the last nine months, I’ve been using all the good God-activity, my doing for Jesus to become a to-do item rather than an opportunity to allow Christ to transform me. Somehow, in all the Bible Study preparations, the service activities, the prayer and worship times, I’ve missed out on the opportunity to grow in deeper intimacy with God. The bucket that I use to water others has a hole in it, but I’ve been moving so quickly to pour it out on others that I’ve failed to notice that I’m ineffectively serving others. Over the course of the last week, I’ve slowed down and realized that my bucket is draining out the bottom and it needs repairing. Unlike the nursery song which ends in deadlock, our buckets can in fact be mended. First, I think it’s important to regularly stop and evaluate our spiritual health. For weeks I’ve been pretending and ignoring that my spiritual life is the way that it is. It looks good on the outside, but internally not so much. Rather like taking a bite of a sour grape. Maybe you don’t have a hole in your bucket, but are there weak spots? Are there areas in your life that you’re missing out on intimacy with Christ because you’re too busy doing things for Him or in His name? Second, let us confess the truth of what we find in our bucket. Proverbs 28:13 says, “Whoever conceals their sin does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” I am so grateful for a God who is merciful and full of grace. That God desires to be in relationship with each of us. This last week, I found that confessing the state of my spiritual health to God, even though he already knows, brought such relief and freedom. I did not encounter a God full of hate, but full of love, mercy and grace. I encountered an invitation to put my bucket down and let the finished work of the cross wash me once again. In this nursery song, Henry keeps asking Liza what to do and Liza offers solutions to Henry on how to fix his bucket which all requires more doing by Henry. How often do you look to other people, other activities, or just keep on going in hope that our bucket will get fixed? Our invitation from God is that when we find a hole in our bucket, we put the bucket down and sit at the foot of the cross and let Christ’s finished work wash us and transform us.